Posted in A Day in the Life, Cozy Cat Press, Destinee Faith Miller Mystery, Marketing the BOok, Tiara Trouble

Sparkle, Baby!

Maybe the best part of writing a series set in the pageant world is that now when I watch Toddlers & Tiaras, I can call it research.  No more guilty pleasure!  It’s research.  It’s for work, y’all.

Maybe the worst part of watching Toddlers & Tiaras is how terribly I feel for some of the children, who are going to grow up to need real therapy.  Not pretend therapy, but reconstructive help to teach them how to feel good about themselves so that they can function beyond just, “Sparkle, Baby!”  No, the worst part is knowing I am watching child abuse for entertainment.  Research.  Researtainment.

Yesterday, I watched an episode with three great sets of parents, and it was as unusual as it was delightful.  The kids were all happy, well-behaved, and seemed quite well-adjusted.  The worst thing the editors could do with the material was to make one mother out to look overly proud of her daughter.  My mother would tell you that there is no such thing as overly proud of your daughter.

Today, I watched a piece of an episode with a mother who made me want to reach through the screen and yank her bald.  The other featured mother was great, and her daughter gave the line of the show.

While she was being interviewed, the little girl talked about raising pigs on their farm.  She said, “We butcher ’em.  Sometimes I’m sad to lose a pig.  …then I’m happy when it tastes good.”  Deadpan delivery.  Didn’t crack a smile.  Kid after my own heart.  BACON!

Meanwhile, I saw my first review from someone I don’t know–a reviewer who has my book as part of an upcoming blog tour.  She gave me 5 stars and I have been squirming happily over it since yesterday.  The first line read, “Ms. Buckman may never be accused of writing great literature,” and went on to glow.  I read that first part before I saw how many stars had been rated, and my jaw dropped.  And I laughed.  Because it is true.  Then, I read the rest of the review and laughed even harder because it was pretty awesome.  I want it written into my will that it is part of my obituary.  “Lane was never accused of writing great literature, but–”

As people who don’t know me, and therefore do not feel obligated to protect my feelings, read the book and enjoy it, I am elated.  When people say they have laughed, I am over the moon.  I love laughing, and I love when I get to be part of making someone else laugh.

So, if you’re local and you’d like to see me laughing in person, join me on October 12, at the Barnes & Noble in Lewisville, TX.  That link takes you to my author event page.  You probably can’t hear the high pitched giggle that accompanies me typing, “my author event page,” but your dog can.  I apologize.

Speechless. Breathless.  Grateful.
Speechless. Breathless. Grateful.
Posted in Chef Lane

Pastry Chef Lane

I used to be able to make really good biscuits. My grandmother loved them. I haven’t made them in a decade though, and I never really counted that as making bread. No yeast.

I finished reading Mennonite in a Little Black Dress and was inspired to try my hand at baking actual bread. I started with double buns called Zwieback, using a recipe I found on Google. It turned out beautifully and is quite good!

I had dough left over, after making 18 double buns, and I also had some bacon I had intended for meatballs, but I thought, “What could make zwieback even better?” And I got right to it. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Zwiebacon:

And in case you wondered, Zwiebacon is insanely good. Delicious. Wonderful. Bacon. Mmmm.

Posted in Chef Lane

Chef Lane: Say Cheese! And Bacon.

I have this Alton Brown recipe for baked macaroni and cheese in the oven right now. This went over very well the last few times I made it.

In the past, I have added storebought, pre-cooked, real bacon bits to spice up the dish. Today, while I was boiling macaroni and making the sauce, I was also frying bacon over a medium heat. My bacon finished up just after the macaroni, so I strained out my pasta and set my cooked bacon aside. I poured the bacon grease into the bottom of my casserole dish and bounced some pasta into it, stirred it up good and thought, “There is still flavor in that skillet.” So, I poured my pasta into the casserole through the skillet. I poured the pasta into the skillet and bounced it around to coat it, then poured that into the casserole.

By the time all the pasta was in there, it was shiny with bacon grease. If that doesn’t sound good to you, you’ve never been to Georgia. (Now I’m missing Home.)

Then, I broke up my bacon into confetti sized pieces and stirred that into the pasta before folding in the sauce and cheese as the recipe directs. Remember that I’m only cooking with a few pieces of ware, so I am having to be a little creative with my timing and my use. I had my pasta cooking in my casserole, had my bacon frying in my skillet, and my sauce going in my only saucepan, so I had to do my transfers differently than the recipe calls for doing.

I’m excited for this to come out of the oven.