I’m on the excitement yo-yo. The B&N book signing is this coming Saturday, followed by the Boston Book Festival next Saturday, and the UTA book signing the following Monday. I am alternately very excited, and very stressed. Excited because–well, obviously. Stressed because what if no one shows up? Then there’s the high of excitement followed by the low of the mundane. I have a book signing at B&N, but I also still have laundry to fold and put away. That doesn’t seem right. In my imagination, a book signing always meant the reality of House Elves, who would fold and put away my laundry for me. (I had totally realistic expectations of marriage, but absolutely delusional ideas of what selling a book would mean.)
Speaking of delusional, or perhaps unrealistic, Halloween is my favorite holiday. I love costumes. I love dressing up. I haven’t had occasion to do so in a few years, but here’s a look back at some of my favorites.
This was the year I went in drag as Captain Jack Sparrow. I was one of about two-hundred-sixty Jack Sparrows at my office, but the only one in drag. I was proud of my work with the mascara wand. I’m telling you, if I could grow a real beard and mustache, I would have the fanciest facial hair you’ve ever seen.
Sadly, this is the only surviving photo of my award winning year as Anna Nicole Smith. I did this one at the height of her reality TV show, which worked well with my girth. The next year, she was repping Trim Spa and ruined my impression.
No idea what I was here. I started out to be a ghost, but my dress was too transparent (and my body all too corporeal for such a transparent dress), so I put a corset on top, tied some curtains around my waist, threw on a wig and a tiara (see! tiara!) and just went around hissing at people like some kind of…whatever it was I was.
I haven’t anywhere to dress up this year, so if you see me on Halloween, I will be playing the part of Snake-Eyes’ mother. Snake-Eyes’ mother is partial to jeans and hoodie sweaters.
If you see me on the 12th, 19th, or 21st at B&N, the Boston Book Festival, or UTA, I will be dressed up as a (hopeful) best selling author.
What are you wearing this year?