We just finished watching Hot Tub Time Machine, which was pretty funny. Slightly misogynistic, but it’s a dude-bro comedy about a hot tub that turns into a time machine, so one must suspend one’s eye-rolls at dude-bro as one does one’s disbelief regarding time travel. I giggled quite a lot. Pretty much anytime Chevy Chase appears, I am guaranteed some sort of laugh.

Now, B has some awful movie on where in the first scene, Gerard Butler’s family is murdered in front of him. Now, Gerard is about to go Charles Bronson all over town.

I do not like movies where children are harmed. Okay, I do not like movies where people are harmed. I am angrily opposed to movies where children are harmed. I didn’t like them before I was a mother, I can’t stand them now. I’m not sure how anyone is entertained by death, especially violent death. Buh.

Perhaps it is having grown up with some violence. I just can’t manage it. I’m a total weenie. I even had to give up certain types of video games because I had such angst when it came to keeping my little characters safe. I was fetal by the time the credits rolled on Braveheart, and only made an exception for watching that due to it being about William Wallace. Given my squeamishness and delicate sensibilities, I avoided The Passion of the Christ. I’d read that story a few times anyway. Remember when Mel Gibson wasn’t crazy?

I don’t mind a movie like Die Hard, or Terminator for some reason. They aren’t shows I would choose, but I can sit through them. Remember when Arnold was an actor? It’s when the violence is graphic, or intense, or prolonged. I’ve never made it through Rocky. I hate boxing! My parents used to watch boxing all the time when I was little. I hate that stuff.

We turned that one off. Now we’re watching Kevin Costner getting it on with Sean Young’s crazy in the back of a limo. Remember when that was shocking? Remember when Kevin Costner was pretty? Sean certainly has some pretty underwear in this movie, but her pancake is awfully white.

You know what’s funny to me? That it is more socially acceptable to watch violence, than it is to watch sex. Me? I don’t want to watch either one, really, but one is quite natural and usually makes consenting participants very happy. The other is something most all of us try to avoid.

You know what movie I used to love? The Presidio. Sean Connery. Oooh. But my favorite movie of all time is Undercover Blues. Dennis Quaid and Kathleen Turner at their primes, and an always enjoyable Stanley Tucci. I always wanted Kathleen Turner and Michael Douglas to get married. They had such great chemistry on screen.