Author: the outside lane

Happy. That about covers it.
Advice, books, Destinee Faith Miller Mystery, Marketing the BOok

How to Get a Book Signing

the outside lane

Okay, you are marketing your new novel.  You are an author with an independent publishing house, using POD press.  You want to get a book signing at your local bookstore.  What do you do?

Before you do anything, you need to be prepared.  You’re going to be having conversations with decision makers, and you need to be ready to answer all kinds of questions.  Before you start calling bookstores do the following:

  1. Gather reviews.  Send your book to readers and beg for reviews–honest reviews.
  2. Write a press release.  I say “Write a press release,” because it is ridiculous to pay someone else $300 to write one for you.  After all, you need a press release written because you are a writer. (More on that later–like in a separate blog entry.)
  3. Find calendar dates and times that work for you and write them down.
  4. Know your ISBN number.
  5. Research whether or not your book is available for the store to purchase.  To do this, go to the store website, and search for your book.  If they can order it, it will be in their list.  If it is an independent store with no website, you can always call and ask if it is available.  Helps to disguise your voice, or practice your British accent.
  6. Write yourself a little script, so that when you are put on hold for the store manager and you’ve listened to muzak for so long you’ve forgotten why you’ve called, you’ll be able to read your script and still sound intelligent.
  7. Spend a few minutes in the mirror repeating the following, “My book is good enough.  My book is smart enough.  Doggone it, people will like it!”

Once you’ve done all that, it is time to start dialing.  When you connect with the store, this will happen:

  1. Someone will answer.  It may be someone who sounds like a nitwit.  Be pleasant.  This should go without saying, but you never know.  No matter who answers the phone, or how they answer it, be kind.  Ask to speak to the store manager, bearing in mind that if it is a nitwit answering the phone, this might terrify them.  No one ever asks to speak to the manager because they are happy, do they?
  2. When the store manager picks up, say something like this, “Hi, [store manager’s name].  My name is Nextbig Thing.  I’m a local author and my new novel is available in your list.  I was calling to find out how to set up a book reading and signing event at your store.”
  3. The manager will probably ask you for the name of your book, or your ISBN.  Then, she’ll look it up and see if she already has some in her store, or how easily she can order them.
  4. Your book is POD.  She will say something like, “Oh.  Your book is POD.”
  5. You will say something like, “Yes.  I am published through Awesomesauce Press, and I’m getting some great reviews…

You know that’s not going to cut it, right?  Here is where you need to be able to sell.  You need to be able to tell the manager WHY it is worth their time to have you taking up space in their store.  Let them know:

  • Why you picked their store.  Do you live just down the road, and are all your neighbors excited to come?  Do you work nearby, and your whole office building wants to support you?
  • How you know your books will sell.  Neighbors?  Coworkers?  You are a Duggar?
  • What marketing/promotion/advertising you’ve already done.  Did you have a good signing at Coffee Houz?  Did the Monday Morning News review your novel?  Are you trending on Twitter #YOURNOVEL?  Did JK Rowling write a blurb for you?

Anything you can think of to distinguish yourself–be prepared to say it.  Be shameless.  You already sold your book to a publisher, now you’re just telling a bookstore manager why the publisher thought your book would sell.  Piece of cake!  Very dry, hard to swallow cake if you hate cold calling as much as I do, but still cake.

After that, the conversation can go any which way.  Your job is to keep a positive attitude.  If the manager isn’t sure about the book, at least she’ll be sure about you.  She might like you so much, she wants to help you.

However the conversation goes, make sure to do two things:

  1. SAY THANK YOU.  The manager just took time out of her day to talk to you.  Again, it should go without saying, but it’s important enough to repeat.
  2. Get the manager’s email address.  Tell her you want to send her your contact information.  Then, follow up with an email.  In that email, say thank you again, attach your press release, any reviews you’ve received, and be sure to include your address so they know you truly are local.

Lather.  Rinse.  Repeat.  Hopefully, everyone will say yes!  If not, eventually, someone will.  Just keep plugging away.

Good luck!

books, Cozy Cat Press, Destinee Faith Miller Mystery, Marketing the BOok, writing

Please Sign my Book

the outside lane

I am adding new dates to the TIARA TROUBLE book signing tour.

Mark your calendars for Saturday, October 12, when I will be at the Lewisville, TX Barnes & Noble from 1–2pm.  BARNES & NOBLE, y’all!  That’s like a real bookstore and stuff!

I just got official word back on it yesterday, but I spent most of last night daydreaming about what I would wear, how I would do my hair, wondering if I should try to match my outfit to my book cover, or just go all black so that the book cover stood out against me when photographed.  I don’t want to clash with my book!  But I don’t want to look like a ninja either.  Destinee isn’t an all black kind of character, and since I am her envoy to the real world, I need to represent her style as best I can.

I finally decided on wearing a sweater that picks up the color Destinee is wearing on the book cover and black trousers.  So, when photographed, the light background of the cover will pop against me, but will still tie together nicely.  I haven’t decided on my hair, or my shoes, yet.

Leslieann knows me well enough that her first email this morning was to ask me what I planned to wear to the B&N event.  Ha!

I am especially excited for this one because a B&N signing is a hard get for a new author out of a small press.  Most small presses use Print on Demand publishing, rather than offset publishing.  With offset printing, a camera ready copy of the manuscript is printed from plates.  Offset, or Traditional Printing happens in bulk for a much lower cost, and allows presses to make better sales deals with buyers.

Say you are an author on Biggest Publishing House Ever’s list.  When you sell YOUR NOVEL, they will use marketing tools to determine how many of your books they should print, and will do it all at once with offset printing.  Then, they sell those books to bookstores in batches.  Maybe Your Local Bookstore buys 20 of them.

If the book sells well, Your Local Bookstore will keep ordering more to put on the shelves.  If the book does not perform, Your Local Bookstore may do a couple of things.  1.  They might put your book on sale and hope the new, lower price makes it move.  2.  Send it back to the vendor who sold it to them for a credit.

If you are an author with Independent Press House, when you sell YOUR NOVEL, it will likely be printed on demand.  Instead of plates being made, etc, etc, a digital copy goes to the press, and they print each book as it is ordered.  It is a much more expensive way to publish, and that cost is passed along to the buyer.

YOUR NOVEL will be available to everyone on every major retailer’s website, but might not make it into a store because a) A small press is less likely to work with a distributor whose job it is to talk national chains into carrying your books in stores, b) a store is less likely to purchase a POD because they cost more AND they are non-returnable.

Whereas books they buy from offset presses can be returned for credit if they don’t move, POD books cannot.  Your Local Bookstore is just stuck with your books if they can’t sell them.

When bookstores do a signing, they need to sell about 30 books in order to offset the cost of the event.  If your book is a POD, the risk on an unknown author is not worth the work of setting up the event.

That’s not to say a bookstore won’t let you come in and do an event if your book is POD, it just means that your sales pitch when asking to hold or be part of an event needs to be that much better.

Some bookstores are sensitive to the plight of the indie press, and they hold semi-annual events allowing a certain number of authors to come in and do signings.  With the larger group, the cost of holding/promoting the event does not really change, but the likelihood of selling 30 books increases.  That doesn’t mean they will order 30 of your books, but it does mean that whatever of yours they have on hand, you’ll be there to sign.  And, in these events, bookstores will often let you bring your own books in to sell on consignment.

The better prepared you are to pitch your novel, the likelier you are to be invited to do an event.

Tomorrow, I’ll tell you what to do to get prepared.  Maybe I’ll know what I’m doing with my hair by then.

 

 

books, writing

Destination Unknown

the outside lane

I tend to write like this:  Writewritewritewritewritecollapse.

Then, I go back into my document the next day and delete the last two pieces of writewrite, pick up from writewritewrite, and start all over again.  I find that I can usually get out about 5,000 good words, with 2,000 or 3,000 that either don’t belong right in that spot, or don’t fit at all.

I hit a really good streak last night, getting Destinee out of some physical peril, only to have her wake up to social peril.  Then, I wrote her out of the social peril.  What I need to do tonight is scratch that “wrote her out of the social peril” bit and stretch that conclusion.

I like to fix problems before I go to sleep at night.  I know how Destinee will solve her problems, but I need to write the process so it doesn’t read like, “This happened to Destinee, and she thought this, and she did that, and we all lived happily ever after.  Hey, Royce!”

Yesterday, I was talking about the balance between writing a feminist character (and make no mistake, Destinee is a feminist), who is a beauty pageant pro and makes a living off her looks.  Feminists come in all shapes, sizes, and occupations, with varying degrees of concern over what one might call exploitation, and another might call career path.  That’s a theme running through Destinee 2 (working title MISS MAYHEM.)

How much of yourself can you put on show and still maintain control of your image?  How much of your image has to do with what you show, and how much has to do with what you tell?  At what point does empowerment become embarrassment?  I’d say it’s different for every woman.  And if you can suss out those issues and catch a killer at the same time, I’d say you deserve a nice, big slice of pie.

I need to give Destinee some time to marinate in the juices of her latest social debacle and soften up her self-confidence so we can get some character growth out of her.

 

A Day in the Life, parenting, School

The Poetry of Math: Roses are Red, Violets are 4

the outside lane

School was pretty straight forward when I was a student.  You went to school, you sat down at your (individual) desk, your teacher lectured, you practiced running drills based on the lecture, you got food and playtime, heard some more lectures, read a book, went home and practiced running drills based on the lectures of the day.  At the end of the week, you took a test to see how well you understood the lectures.  At the end of six weeks, you tried to explain to your parents that you did really well on the tests, you just didn’t understand why you needed to turn in that stupid homework, and didn’t think it was fair that the 0s on homework made the As on tests average out to Cs on your report card.

Note to self:  Math is ultimate adjudicator.  There is no fair, or unfair, only correct.

Note to Math:  This is why I hate you.  It is also why I respect you and am in love with your sexy younger brother, Physics.  Physics, call me!

School is confusing now.  Maybe not for the kids who are growing up in the system, but for me, and for some of the other bewildered parents I know, it is convoluted and entirely not mathematical.  We’re in good company with Slate’s Dahlia Lithwick, though.

[At the school open house] I felt as if I were toggling between a business school seminar and the space program; acronyms alone—seemingly random sequences of letters like MAP and SOL and EAPE—were being deployed more frequently than actual words. To be sure, the teachers seemed as maddened by it as the parents were. Even if we can all agree about the singular benefits of “project-based learning across the curriculum,” I am less than perfectly certain any of us knows what it means.

Last year, we got a letter in the mail telling us that we wouldn’t be seeing “grades” for the duration of elementary school.  No 0s, As, or Cs to worry about.  No math to worry about.  Only the wonder of still progressing toward the standard, having met the standard, or having exceeded it.

At our open house, Thor’s wonderful math teacher (and she is really a great teacher–we’ve had nothing but great teachers at this school, which is why I am not entirely alarmed by all the Big Brother Speak) was explaining how that applied to mathematics.  One father voiced my question, “But how will we know if he knows what he is doing?  Do we have worksheets or anything where we can time him, and see?  How much time should we spend on it every night?”

I knew exactly what he was talking about.  Part of my elementary school torment  drilling was the daily worksheet.  We would get 100 math questions (addition, subtraction, then multiplication, and division, then fractions–damn them to hell!) on a long sheet, and have 60 seconds to fly through as many answers as we could.  We memorized 7+2=9, and 5-4=1, and 6×2=12, and 18/3=6, and 1/2+3/4=1 1/4.  We didn’t have to sit and work the math on fingers, or blocks, or beads, we just knew.

Wonderful Math Teacher tried valiantly to explain that we no longer focus on memorization of mathematics, but on fluency of numbers.  I did not know what this meant, and neither did the father, who asked for clarification.

Fluency of numbers, WMT explained, helped a child be able to solve problems by words I had never heard put together in a sentence before and could not possibly begin to recount to you.  She did give the example that fluency meant instead of a child memorizing 7+2=9, they wanted a child to be able to look at 7+2= and say to themselves, “Well, 7+3=10, so if I take away 1, I have 9.  7+2=9.”

My question was, “How does the child know that 7+3 is 10?  Is that memorized?” Because fluency isn’t an exact science, and math…is.

I am fluent in English and still don’t understand half of what Rush Limbaugh says because his concepts and ideologies are so different from mine, he may as well be speaking a different language.  I turn on Fox and tilt my head like I’m a dog watching television.

I am terrible at math, but I know that I can follow formulas and rules, and plug variables into computations and get exact, binding, non-negotiable answers because Math is Facts.  You can add letters into math as placeholders, but you can’t make those placeholders mean anything without rules.  And the rules are not nebulous, variable things like guidelines for grammar or spelling.

If math ran grammar and spelling, it would be impossible to put an i before an e, or end a sentence with a preposition.  You just couldn’t do it.

I grew up going to school run by Math rules.  My son is growing up going to school run by Poetic License.  It seems scary to me.

When I was taking my teaching certification courses, we were told that the old school Sage from the Stage style of lecturing was passe.  We were told that today’s teachers are Guides standing Beside.  I don’t know about you, but when I’m out in the wilderness, I want the Guide out in front of me because he knows where the snakes are.  And I want that because that’s how I grew up, or I want that because it is the most pragmatic approach?

There are as many different learning styles as there are children, and as many different home lives, which factors in greatly to how a child is able to receive instruction in a classroom.  I’m on a learning curve trying to match up with what my son thinks is a learning straight line.

I still think flash cards are the way to go.

If you need me, I’ll be problematizing cross-curricular content throughout multiple modalities in order to better integrate hands-on goals within the new paradigm.

Wish me luck.

I have to say again and again that Thor’s teachers are fantastic.  

GIving, Philanthropy

I’ll Be Home For Christmas

the outside lane

My father was stationed in Okinawa when I was small.  My mother tells a story of finding me in my room, packing.  I was going to go see him.  I didn’t know how I was going to get there, or where exactly it was, but I was packed and ready to go.  I think the best part about the whole Little Miss Phenix City pageant for me, was that it coincided with Dad’s leave time, so he was there for all the hoopla.  I was young enough that I believed the Marine Corps had let him come home just to see me, and I was plotting ways to enter other pageants just so he could visit.

You and I both know that the Marine Corps thinks about as much of Puppy Bowl pageants as North Korea thinks about human rights, but that’s the way a child’s mind works.

My company is supporting a group called Luke’s Wings for Christmas, this year.  Luke’s Wings works to reunite wounded service men and women with their families.  Families like the one we learned about, whose Marine father was shot three times in the chest and once in the head, while working to train Iraqi soldiers.  When the family was notified of the incident, one of the Marine’s sons asked where his father had been shot.  The boy was about the same age I was at the time of the Little Miss pageant, and his response to hearing that his father had been shot in the chest and head was to say he was glad it wasn’t anywhere important, like in his arms, so he would still be able to play football when he got home.  Because that’s the way a child’s mind works.

That Marine spent close to 2 years in the hospital recovering, and Luke’s Wings provided a way for his family to travel from Texas to Maryland to visit with him while he was on the mend.

Luke’s Wings has made it possible for many families to be with their wounded service men and women, and made it possible for those men and women to heal with help and love, or get to see someone they love before passing–because not all of them make it.

If you’re looking for a place to give this year, Luke’s Wings is a GuideStar Trusted non-profit.  Their goal is to raise $500,000 by December 25th, with the mission to reunite 1500 wounded soldiers with their families.  It’s worthwhile and important, and it’s a group I’ll be supporting this year.

I can’t imagine how crazy I would be if something had happened to my son, and I couldn’t afford to get to him.  I’m very thankful there is a group who has thought about that.

Luke’s Wings is an organization dedicated to the support of service members who have been wounded in battle.  Recognizing the immediate need for families to be with their loved ones at such a difficult time, Luke’s Wings provides families with the means to visit during the service member’s hospitalization and rehabilitation.  By purchasing travel agency services and travel tickets for loved ones, Luke’s Wings provides an immediate and invaluable service to the families of our men and women at arms while also helping to encourage and motivate the service member’s recovery.

In 2011, Luke’s Wings expanded the mission to also include Texas Veterans during major life events and all Veterans in Hospice Care. As such; a Texas Veteran may be with their family during a major life event. A Veteran in Hospice Care may be surrounded by loved ones as they pass away. Today, the majority of requests are for World War II Veterans, Korean War Veterans, and Vietnam War Veterans in elderly care facilities or long term inpatient care facilities. Luke’s Wings regards the Veterans in Hospice Care Program as a “final salute” to the greatest generation that ever lived.

In 2012, Luke’s Wings was asked to provide emergency flights for the families of our special operators who are injurred on special missions. Luke’s Wings is honored to be the “go-to” for the Special Operations Command (S.O.C.OM.). We are honored to be of service to our special operators as part of the S.O.C.O.M. Care Coalition.

While individual donations may be made directly on our website, Luke’s Wings also asks corporations to support our cause with corporate sponsorships and in-kind donations.

Recognizing the difficulties families encounter as they make their way to their loved ones’ side, Luke’s Wings purchases the plane tickets and plans the trips, then Luke’s Wings partners with other non profit who can provide other services including, but not limited to, free or discounted accommodations, meals, entertainment, local travel vouchers, city tours, etc.